In a world of words it is very easy to label behaviour, and therefore people. These words and labels can stick for decades or even a lifetime!
The words we use literally begin to shape the way our children interact with both their inner and outer worlds.
It is widely understood in the epi-genetics and neuroscience communities that from birth through to the age of 6/7 the mind of a child is wide open.
For the first two years a child’s brain is in delta brain wave state (sleep state) and from two to six years a child’s brain is operating in theta brain wave state (hypnosis state).
Basically… children under six/seven are in a constant hypnotic trance state below consciousness (you might relate this to seeing a hypnotist making adults cluck like chickens in a room full of people… this is how suggestible children can be).
This means, small children do not / cannot filter and are like sponges, taking in everything around them through all their senses.
The word “shy” in the dictionary is often used to describe someone as frightened…
Most often it is used with more negative connotations, it is never used in an empowering or positive way.
🛑 Stop it now! 🛑
There are reasons why children stand back and wait before engaging – they are LISTENING to their INSTINCTS. They are OBSERVING.
They are deciding
WHEN they are ready
HOW they want to move forward
WHO they want (and are comfortable) engaging, connecting, playing with
WHAT their next action will be
It is a POSITIVE and EMPOWERING thing to be able to LISTEN and TRUST your INTUITIONS.
Rather than being made to feel being “shy” is a “bad” or “negative” thing, and then doing something you don’t want to do!
If we don’t teach this to our children now, and we start encouraging them to feel that waiting and observing and listening to their instincts is a “bad” thing or a “weak” way to be in the world, we will be wondering why as teenagers and adults they “do as their friends do” and make choices that aren’t for their highest good – and could potentially put them in a position to be harmed.
CHILDREN ARE NOT SHY!
They are INTELLIGENT, in touch with their INSTINCTS and should be ENCOURAGED and TRUSTED to make decisions around when, how, who, where, what and why they do as they do.
Please stop the label of “shy” now.
Equally, it’s important we don’t try to coerce, convince or force children (whether or not it’s a new or familiar environment and/or people) when they are in this state of observation and internal decision making.